The Wedding of Miriam and Paul

Although, technically, I could have written about this last entry I didn’t; I was already a week behind and had plenty to write about as it was. So I left it for this week. Anyway, the wedding was that of my friend Miriam Lyon, to Paul vander Woude, and it took place in Renmark - a town in the country about 250km away.

Like most of my friends in Adelaide, I met Miriam doing theatre; specifically, in the Burnside Players production of Daisy Pulls It Off¹ in which I was the stage manager and she was in the cast. In a way I’m actually surprised that we became friends because it was my first time as SM and I was having a few problems and not necessarily dealing with them very well; I was stressed and shitty and even more prickly than normal. Miriam’s one of the most capable people I’ve met, and I got the feeling she considered it a bit of a débâcle, and me a blundering dimwit.².

So I was more than a little surprised when she showed up at the house party I hosted not long after Daisy finished – I hadn’t invited her (I don't tend to invite people to things if they think I'm an incompetent nitwit, even if it happens to be true - hmm, this may be why I only ever have small parties); I’m still not sure who did. But I ended up talking to her at some point (it helped that I’d had quite a lot to drink) and I was surprised to find that she didn’t have a problem with me at all. And we’ve been friends ever since. We’ve done two shows together, both Shakespeares: The Taming of the Shrew and Much Ado About Nothing – and I managed to not resent her (too much) for getting the part I wanted in the latter (Don John – the villain).

Anyway, she moved down to the Riverland to be with Paul (he’s from Barmera, another smaller town near Renmark) a while back, and it wasn’t too much of a surprise when they announced their engagement. The invitations arrived announcing the wedding would be on November 14 and be held in Renmark. At the time it seemed so far away; however, October rolled around in the blink of an eye and it was time to start thinking about things.

But I didn’t have to think about too much; one of my friends (Miriam³ who was also invited is from the area, and had charged her mother with the task of sorting the accommodation. And, since it was a trip she was used to making – and she is possessed of a car more suitable for distance than my own – we went in her car. All I had to do was be home when the time came to be collected. Oh, and to choose some cds for the journey.

Things got a little bit more interesting when, the week before the wedding, the weather in South Australia became unseasonably warm. And by warm I mean the Saturday the week before the wedding being the first of eight straight days in Adelaide with maxima above 35°C – keeping in mind that Renmark tends to be at least three or four degrees hotter than the corresponding city temperature.

The hot week scorched on and the forecast temperature for the Saturday fluctuated a few degrees either way but finally settled on 43°C. Not exactly what you want for a three hour drive followed by a ceremony in an old stone church. At least I didn’t have to wear a proper suit – or a wedding dress.

I did come very close to wearing a short-sleeved shirt to the wedding but didn’t, for two reasons: 1) I didn’t own one suitable, and when I went browsing for one decided that I didn’t like any that didn’t cost more than I wanted to spend, and 2) I can’t abide wearing a tucked-in short-sleeved shirt but, similarly, couldn’t go to a wedding⁴ wearing an untucked shirt. So, I went with long-sleeves; fortunately, I do own a decent enough 100% cotton shirt, so I wore that. As it was I was dressed up a lot more than many of the guests – but less so than others, and far less so than the men in the wedding party⁵, who had vests on.

Anyway, we left Adelaide somewhere after ten or so, and drove pretty much straight through to Renmark where we stopped to get food (and some cold & flu capsules for me; I was still sick from the week before and I needed to make sure my nose wasn’t running during the wedding) and then found the Renmark hotel where we were staying.

Since there was an hour or so before the wedding, we kicked back for a while in the air-conditioned room and had showers before heading back out into the heat and driving to the church. Despite the fact that it had (as far as I’m aware) reached the forecast 43°C, it didn’t actually feel as bad as I’d expected it too feel – though that was outside, where we had the benefit of a slight river breeze.

We forced ourselves into the church where it was – as expected – very hot and stuffy; while there were a few languid ceiling fans they served for little more than stirring the hot air above us. Somebody had, however, very sensibly filled a couple of big eskys with bottled water, which got handed out before and during the ceremony – it made a huge difference as (to my knowledge, at least) no-one actually passed out.

The ceremony was – well, ceremonial. The priest⁶ seemed intent on making it far more about Jesus than about the couple, which I found somewhat offensive – and just because I’m not a Christian. Really, if I’d wanted to hear about Jesus I’d have gone on a Sunday. But I wasn’t there for me; ergo, what I think isn’t all that important. So, we sang a few hymns, listened to a couple of bible readings and a some more preaching before it was over.

We lingered outside for a while before heading back to the hotel to get in a few drinks before the reception was due to start; Miriam and two other Adelaideans Bonnie & Rhodri (plus their one-and-a-bit-year-old, Callum) and I propped up the bar for a while before heading off to the venue, which was the function room of a rose garden.

After finding our tables, which were all named after famous dogs; ours was ‘Laika’, which I remembered was the dog sent into orbit as part of the Russian space program and who was immortalised on a stamp⁷. I suggested that, since we were a table of (mostly) theatre people, it could be that we were meant to be the space cadets – though it could have been worse; one of the other tables was ‘Goofy’.

The heat had had its effect on me; I had a headache that several rapid beers failed to diminish, so I stopped bothering – when I’m like that I just cannot get drunk and there’s really no point trying. A bit annoying, but not that much of a imposition.

So we spent the rest of the night sitting around, talking - to old friends and new people - and drinking and having a good time. Dinner – three different salads (Caesar, potato & bacon and rocket & pear) plus a mixed grill, followed by either a chocolate cupcake with mint icing or a vanilla cupcake with icing I’ve no idea the flavour of because I had the chocolate/mint and didn’t bother to ask what the alternative was. Speeches were made and cake was cut and then it was time to go. It wasn’t a particularly late night since at about 10.30 or so Miriam and I got a lift back to the hotel with Bonnie and Rhodri as they were staying there as well.

The air-conditioner chugged away all night; once I tried to go to sleep I realised exactly how loud it was – it was like having a rock tumbler or coffee bean grinder in the room. Temperature, however, was inversely proportional to volume: it was freezing. But it only had an on/off switch, not any kind of adjustable setting, so there wasn’t a lot I could do; I didn’t want to turn it off entirely because the room would then get too hot. So, despite it having been a 43°C day, I got under the medium-weight hotel blanket and went to sleep.

I was up fairly early the next morning – I consider eight o’clock a sleep in these days; a far cry from years ago where sloth was my watchword and on most days I rarely crawled out of bed before noon – and we were back on the road before too long. Very little to note about the return journey, other than an a short-lived upset stomach cured rapidly by some appropriate substances, and a rather nice blueberry pie from the famous Waikerie Bakery.

And that was that. Another wedding over with – though it’s not long until the next: Selena and Shane’s on November 28.

I don’t tend to do a lot of traveling – heck, my parents have come down twice from Queensland and seen far more of the state than I have in nigh on twelve years of living here – but it was good to be there for Miriam and Paul’s special day, and to see a few friends I hadn’t seen for a while. Not to mention a brief reminder that there are places outside the city limits⁸. Not places I necessarily want to stay for any length of time, mind you – but overnight isn’t too much torture, even for a stay-at-home indoors-type like myself.


¹Yes, I’m aware that that’s a title dripping with the potential for a double entendre. Please don’t – for all our sakes.
²Despite that being an accurate description, she’d ever actually say that; she’s far too nice.
³Not the same one who was getting married, obviously.
⁴A church wedding, at least. I wore a short-sleeved shirt and shorts to my niece Jasmine’s wedding – but that was on a beach so it was okay. Hilariously (or not) that day was cold and miserable.
⁵The women are the bridal party – are the men the groomal party? I think that should be a word.
⁶I’m not sure if that’s the official appellation for the denomination, which I believe was Anglican.
⁷Why I know this I’m not quite sure, since I’ve never done much research on Russia, dogs, space programs or stamps.
⁸For those who aren’t aware, I did actually grow up in ‘the country’ – I just never felt at home there and consider myself to be truly citified in every sense of the word. I really like seeing llamas and alpacas though.